Haunting Mistakes

Each second is precious, a moment in time so minuscule, yet, it seems to stretch on into infinity. Each breath is painful, frantic and in a great hurry, and though you know you are only wasting vital oxygen, you can’t find it in yourself to stop. Your drowning, you are being crushed. Erratic and without reason, the reality of being buried alive is the worst possible horror anyone can experience. And yet, you know, the reason you are in this position is because of your own foolish choices, your own greed and envy. It’s like a sickness, a plague, one you can’t ever be cured from. It’ll fester inside you, blacken your soul and steal from you all that is good and wonderful in your life. First, it was your family. Than, your business.

Now your life.

It started all those years ago, when you first fell in love with addiction, a viral parasite writhing under your flesh, feasting on your insecurities and weaknesses, until at last if had found its foot hold. The drugs, the alcohol, those idiots you let into your life. They raced in and stole everything else. You dropped out of school, feel into the pit of no return, with your only friend being the very things that put you there in the first place.

Wait… you put yourself there.

Yet, you didn’t stop there. It continued into your adult life, the clawing, crushing feeling building with every passing year. You knew you were dying, you knew what you were killing yourself; but you did nothing to change your situation. The sickness was there, a black, oily thing that took the most precious thing from you; free will.

You were the slave, the innocent child locked in the basement, abducted and brain washed.

And than, you stepped into the darkest part of this world. The place only the most desperate and lost ever went. You went to them, you joined the Black Cats. The leaders of this hopeless reality. The sadistic monsters that watched the world burn, watched innocents drown in their own poison. You went to them. You did this. You relinquished all hope for forgiveness.

More creature than man, you turned on the very people who once tried so much to help. You killed your mother, your father, good, decent people. You ruined your children future, stealing from them.

With the streets aglow in ghoulish grins, jack o lanterns and howling witches, you had stepped onto the street, where those poor children were. You abducted them, all for a chance to get a quick buck. To what? Get a one up on the man who actually did right by your broken family? Did you not like that he'd replaced you, became something you always wanted to be, yet, never had the balls to make the change.

And than, to put the nail in the proverbial coffin, they turned on you. Like feral cats, untethered to no master, the Cats had bared their claws. They accepted your sacrifice with a purr, only to bare their claws. Bleeding, scared, you were tossed out into the cold, their hounding shrieks a foul sound in the air, grating and wretched, mocking your for your own weakness.

Yet, you should have known that wouldn't have been the end. Its only in movies where evil is left to regret their mistakes. They found you, dragged you into the dank and the cold. They tied you up, laughing at your mindless, desperate pleas. they abducted you, and you were left in the pitch black, left to cry painful tears of regret.

Now, you are buried alive, the space seeming to shrink, your thoughts scattered as the oxygen runs out. Your dying, you know it. You know there is no hope for you. You are alone, you are without anyone who could ever care for you again. Clawing at the bare wood until your finger tips are bloody, kicking against the hinge, wanting to get out. Needing to get out. But you know its hopeless. You are six feet under. Buried under years of foolish mistakes and ugly truths and lies. Staring down at you, imprinted with an iron stencil, a grinning cat leers down at your final moments of life.

And than... you wake up.

Your lying in your bed, embracing the woman you love. The disease is still there, thriving in the shadows of your mind, but yet, its not to late. Theres hope for you yet, there in that moment. Your cat, your little black cat, it sits at the door frame, watching you, with yellow eyes and a smug glance. Just waiting to devour you whole from the inside out.

It's Halloween tonight.